zortharg's art Reviews on Newgrounds

[Hog Heaven]

If anyone ever vomits pascal's wager at me again, I'm referring them to this comic. "If YOU'RE right, it doesn't MATTER if you become hyperobese, but if I'M right, then you should definitely eat until you're 800 pounds, and you just can't risk the consequences of doing otherwise". Though another good one though is to say "you may not THINK that walmart-loving zombies will destroy civilization tomorrow except leave the wal-marts alone untouched, but however unlikely that is, you shouldn't risk the consequences, so you should definitely go into a walmart right now and stay there until tomorrow - and not just for one day - even if I'm wrong for today, the same will be true tomorrow and the day after, so you should never leave. The consequences of doing otherwise are too dire to risk."

I like the face of the woman who's 3rd from the right and reclining. She looks kind of like cookie monster. COOOOKKKIIIIEEEEEEEE!!!! She might actually be saying that.

[Braille Museum]

Oh that's harsh. The best of your jokes I've seen by far.

[The noble beaver]

That's not a dam. That's a fuc. You see what I did there?

GASP! It's the 6-fingered man! My name is Inima Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

[Police Bribe]

Ahh yes, this is basically the same as my very favorite sketch from the kids in the hall, where the guy sketches the other guy from the sound of his voice, and makes a ridiculously simple kid's drawing, but then the guy who was being drawn comes out of his booth and that's actually exactly what he looks like. Though point of fact, it IS a bribe, it's still a hundred dollar bill there, right? He didn't take out an ID that simply looked like the franklin in the hundred dollar bill.

[Amoeba Birthday]

If that's how they reproduce, what exactly is it that they would do together in bed then?

[NWO Burger]

People're still going on about NWO? Insider trading isn't part of any conspiracy stuff though, that's just when someone who works for the company who was paid in stock instead of money, sells his stock (or if he's bold, sells short or buys put options), because he knows the company is doing badly because he works there and the saps who were duped into buying the stock who don't work there don't know it yet. No illuminati membership needed there, just a pair of eyes.

[The First Idea]

Eh. They don't have to be cavemen to be before the lightbulb, just anyone up to the late 19th century. I wonder what flies around his head when he gets hit in the head though, maybe winged wooly mammoths. And when he has an ethical dilemma, what sits on his left shoulder telling him the moral thing to do and what sits on his right shoulder telling him the evil thing to do? Perhaps Wilma and Barney Flintstone.

[Wizard of Oz]

Wow, I didn't see that coming. Though point of fact, the strawman shouldn't be bleeding, but it works for emphasizing the overarching premise of one of my sweet and innocent movies of childhood being horribly raped in front of me I suppose. I guess it isn't that out of left field, I've seen this sort of joke a few times before.

....Who best to show up to beat up the lion and the tin man though, Dr. Who maybe? The last episode before it ended in the 80s, he battled against furries, though they were cheetahs, not lions, and he's certainly fought plenty of robots. Though that's certainly not unique to Dr. Who the way the scarecrow is with batman, lots of things have fought lots of robots, Batman included. I wouldn't want to make a crossover reference to the Jesus lion from Narnia, but not a lot of lions really come to mind to work with.

[Johnny Bravo!]

Oh Johnny, you poor sap. Always hopeful but things never go your way. Nothing exciting or innovative about this image though. What's the point for its existence. You want to know the sort of thing you should make? Here's a hilarious cartoon of him I saw on deviantart: http://gashi-gashi.deviantart.com/art/Johnny-Bravo-Style-276251283 You're welcome. See now, you should do something like that instead, that's actually something.

[Super Meat Boy Street Art]

Hmmm. I can't help but think that a Time Fcuk "get in the box!" could have been more awesome, if you're going to go with homages to that guy's work, meat boy is just.... gross.

polhudo responds:

I was thinking about doing the Time Fcuk guy but it's so colorless, just black and white. I might do it later.